Transcripts of BP at White House FOUND.

Well it didn’t take long to hear what was said between BP’s CEO and the Obama Administration during last weeks meeting. It was a pretty short meeting considering the damage done.

The following is a recap of the meeting:

Mr Hayward enters the room and sits in a chair that seems to be very low, his shoulders were almost even with the top of the table.

Obama’s advisers walk in, including Rahm Emanuel, David Axelrod, Janet Napolitano and surprisingly Al Sharpton. (Nobody expected Al to show up for this) and they all took their seats directly across from Mr Hayward. The seats they were sitting in seemed very tall, their knees bumping against the bottom of the table.

Mr Hayward rises to shake hands but was ignored,  a very awkward silence fell over the room.

President Obama enters the room (15 minutes late) as sound system in the room began playing “Hail to the chief”

Mr Obama, acknowledges his pals in the room with handshakes and pats on the back, he glances over at Mr Hayward and says “Thank you for coming” followed by “Please, turn the sound off, lets be seated”

Mr Hayward led off the meeting with “The oil spill in the gulf has been a real problem…” He was interrupted almost immediately by the President

Obama:“You’re telling me, my poll numbers have plummeted”

Mr Hayward: “Sir, I’m talking about the toll it’s taking to the people in the gulf”

Al Sharpton chimed in: “Mr Hayward, you seem to have a problem with Black people, do you not care about Obama’s poll numbers because he’s black and he’s used to being unfairly criticized?”

Mr Hayward; “Uh…Oh…Wait, I though I was here to talk about the oil spill?”

Rahm Emmanuel entered the conversation: “Look you Mothrfkr, your rig blew up and took Obama’s poll numbers down just as quick as the rig, what are you going to do to fix that”?

Mr Hayward: “Sir, with all due respect I think we should be talking about the Oil sp…”He was interrupted by Obama again.

Obama: “Look Mr Hayward, there are a lot of problems with this gulf issue, my poll numbers are but one part of it but we must start somewhere” He continued: ” So where we are is, my poll numbers are going to make it impossible to get all of my hope and change issues through congress, the poll numbers are making it very tough on me while on the golf course. I can’t seem to focus and my putting has really been a problem”

Mr Hayward: “Well I know what you mean sir, I would like my life back too” At this point, Rahm Emmanuel stood up, walked over to Mr Hayward and yelled:”YOU WANT YOUR LIFE BACK? DID YOU NOT HEAR ABOUT BARRACKS GOLF GAME? You seem to be very insensitive to the real problems your rig has caused.” Rahm then takes a seat right next to Mr Hayward….

At this time the door swings open so hard it puts and knob imprint on the wall behind it, Joe Biden storms into the room

Joe Biden: “This is a big Fkin deal Mr President” Biden turns around and leaves as everyone is nodding in agreement.

Obama continued: “Okay Mr Hayward, lets get down to brass tacks here; This weekend I have a lot on my plate and a T time at really nice course I’ve been dying to play. I don’t want the media to start questioning my concern over this oil leak issue. So how do we handle this?”

Mr Hayward: “Well sir, I would really like to discuss the impact of the spill to the Gulf and to BP which has promised to pay for this mess. I think we should focus on the claims and try and remove some obstacles..” He was then interrupted by David Axelrod

Axelrod: “What Obama is trying to say is, what can you do to help him this weekend”?

Sharpton: “Mr Hayward, why are you trying to keep Barrack from enjoying fathers day? are you a racist?”

Obama; “LOOK, someone better come up with some answers to this problem and I mean right now!”

Mr Hayward; “Jeeze, I should have just gone sailing”

Obama: “NOW that’s what I wanted to hear. You go sailing this weekend the media will vilify you but I can then get away for a round of golf and ball game”

Mr Hayward: “Uh..Um…” Rahm Emanuel then moves his chair a bit closer and whispers something in Mr Hayward’s ear…

Mr Hayward: “Okay Mr President, I’ll go sailing this weekend” he continued: “Now what about the other issues”?

Mr Obama: “Well that’s settled then, lets get together next week and discuss Green technology”

Now we know the details of the meeting…Can’t wait for the next one.