Obama the Warrior.
Now if you don’t laugh at this you are dead already.
Snatched from Jenn at Screw Liberals
Experience COUNTS!
The Presidential election was too close to call. Neither the Republican candidate nor the Democratic candidate had enough votes to win. There was much talk about ballot recounting, court challenges, etc., but a week-long ice fishing competition seemed the sportsman like way to settle things. The candidate that caught the most fish at the end of the week would win the election.
Therefore, it was decided that there should be an ice fishing contest between the two candidates to determine the winner.
After much back and forth discussion, it was decided that the contest take place on a remote frozen lake in northern Minnesota.
There were to be no observers present, and both men were to be sent out separately on this isolated lake and return at 5 P.M. with their catch for counting and verification by a team of neutral parties. At the end of the first day, John Mc. returned to the starting line and he had ten fish.
Soon, Obama returned and had no fish. Well, everyone assumed he was just having another ‘bad hair’ day or something and hopefully, he would catch up the next day.
At the end of the 2nd day John Mc. came in with 20 fish and Obama came in again with none. That evening, Harry Reid got together secretly with Obama and said, ‘Obama, I think John Mc. is a low-life, cheatin’ son-of-a-gun. I want you to go out tomorrow and don’t even bother with fishing. Just spy on him and see just how he is cheating.’
The next night. after John Mc. returns with 50 fish, Harry Reid said to Obama, ‘Well, tell me, how is John Mc. cheating?’
Obama replied, ‘Harry, you’re not going to believe this, but he’s cutting holes in the ice’.
Experience DOES Count!
Sent to me by Southern Sass.
My New Favorite Vlogger
Found At TexasFreds
The power of COMMON SENSE!!!
Truthfully I would vote for this guy before Obama. This guy has a clue and Oh yeah he appears to be black. I am sure he will be ridiculed in the “African American” community, but in private those same folks will realize he is right.
L.A. Math Test
LOS ANGELES MATH TEST
City of Los Angeles High School Math Proficiency Exam
Name:_____________________
Gang:_____________________
1. Duane has an AK47 with a 30 round clip. If he misses 6 out of 10 shots and shoots 13 times at each drive by shooting, how many drive by shootings can he attempt before he has to reload? __________
2. If Joe has 2 ounces of cocaine and he sells an 8 ball to Jackson for $320 and 2 grams to Billy for $85 per gram, what is the street value of the balance of the cocaine if he doesn’t cut it? __________
3. Rufus is pimping for 3 girls. If the price is $65 for each trick, how many tricks will each girl have to turn so Rufus can pay for his $800 per day crack habit? __________
4. Jerome wants to cut his 1/2 pound of Heroin to make 20% more profit. How many ounces of cut will he need? __________
5. Willie gets $200 for stealing a BMW, $50 for a Chevy and $100 for a 4×4. If he has stolen 2 BMW’s and 3 4×4’s, how many Chevy’s will he have to steal to make $800? __________
6. Richard is in prison for 6 years for murder. He got $10,000 for the hit. If his common law wife is spending $100 per month, how much money will he have left when he gets out of prison and how many years will he get for killing the bitch that spent his money? __________
7. If the average spray paint can covers 22 square feet and the average letter is 3 square feet, how many letters can a tagger spray with 3 cans of paint? __________
8. Peter knocked up 6 girls in his gang. There are 27 girls in the gang. What percentage of the girls in the gang has Hector knocked up? __________
:rotflmao:
New Condom ad
This probably won’t last long so view it quick… LMAO
Best Obama ad EVER!
Some Wisdom for my Redneck Friends…
If you live by these words of wisdom, you will at least make it to a ripe old age….Well maybe.
1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.
2. It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
3. Sex is like air — it’s not important unless you aren’t getting any.
4 No one is listening until you fart.
5. If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
6. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away, and you have their shoes.
7. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
8. Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
9. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was worth it.
10. Don’t worry–It only seems kinky the first time.
11. Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
12. There are two theories about arguing with women. Neither one works.
13. Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
14. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night .
And if you still wonder if Wisdom is important, wonder no more, we have the Obamamessiah to lead us on a path of righteousness and wellness:
To be fair and balanced….
Tell me this aint the truth….
Our leadership, GOD HELP US!
