Some Wisdom for my Redneck Friends…
If you live by these words of wisdom, you will at least make it to a ripe old age….Well maybe.
1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.
2. It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
3. Sex is like air — it’s not important unless you aren’t getting any.
4 No one is listening until you fart.
5. If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
6. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away, and you have their shoes.
7. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
8. Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
9. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was worth it.
10. Don’t worry–It only seems kinky the first time.
11. Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
12. There are two theories about arguing with women. Neither one works.
13. Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
14. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night .
And if you still wonder if Wisdom is important, wonder no more, we have the Obamamessiah to lead us on a path of righteousness and wellness:
5 Replies to “Some Wisdom for my Redneck Friends…”
That’s gotta be some kind of racist hate speech…
What do ya say Donnie?? Hate speech ot NOT hate speech??
@TexasFred: Of Course it is Fred, I absolutely forgot to run it pass the Internet sensor at American Fucknozzle, I am awaiting my fine notification letter from the moral police chief Don Douglas.
This wisdom is cool for me too, not just for rednecks I think.
Isaacs Is talking about..National day yesterday and stuff today
As I watched Michael Phelps accept the gold medal for swimming in China, and they played the Star Spangled Banner, and the Americans put their hand over their heart, I felt that overwhelming pride in being an American. It made me think about how I want a President who truly loves this country, as I do. A President who has fought, and is wiling to fight for our traditions, and honors our history … including the words in the Star Spangled Banner … not somebody who would worry that the words in the Star Spangled Banner might offend foreigners from other countries … not somebody who doesn’t hold their hand over their heart during the Star Spangled Banner … and, not somebody who listens to words like ‘God Damn America’ for 20 years … that’s why I’m voting for Senator John McCain in November!!!
@Howard: I’ll vote for McCain as well, but not happily, not with any type of hope that he will actually fix any of the current problems, AND NOT because I think he is the best man for the job. I will vote McCain holding my nose and kicking the box because; he is a SMALL bit better than the opposing candidate. The difference between Obama, and McCain are not that great IMO. They are a lot closer on important issues than most folks realize.
IF you think I am anti-republican, I AM right now. I have had it with the pandering, lying and corruption that the current REPUBS seem to bring to the table. I haven’t even begun to let loose on McCain criticism yet. If he wins (By some miracle) I will be a regular McCain basher. His ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT views, his gun grabbing tendencies, and his PANDERING to “The Race” AKA La Raza are reason enough to cringe at the thought of McCain in charge.
McCain seems to take it for granted that we will vote for him because he is “the better of two evils” and that disgusts me.
I honestly don’t know if I can vote for the man, I think it would be very hypocritical of me to vote for a person that does not align with my views. IF I have the ability to write in, I might. I might check a box next to Barr, I might take a shit in the voting booth… There are a lot things up in the air right now, I am waiting on a VP pick.
THERE are several candidates that align very close with the most basic views I hold dear, and McCain has not demonstrated he is one of them.